A pedestrian's lament



Smug SOB



At first glance, Auckland appears to be a pedestrian’s paradise. 

Its tree-lined sidewalks are plentiful, safe, and clean – considerably cleaner than those of any Canadian city of comparable size.  I don’t think I saw as much as a piece of garbage or a wad of spit during the many hours I’ve spent roaming Auckland’s street these past few days. 

And the sidewalks are wide.  Often wide enough that two adults could each walk with their arms outstretched to their full wingspan and still let another person pass between them without touching. 

Look how wide Queen street (the main drag) is!

Visually, it’s all very nice too.  The Skytower dominates the skyline, looming impressively overhead.  The waterfront is always nearby, glinting invitingly at the end of many a street.  And the trees are so nice – palm, conifer, leafy, flowery – and many housing some of the many bird varieties endemic to New Zealand.

Skytower looming phalically

It’s really all very pleasant…as long as you never want to cross a street. Cause sweet overpriced cupcake are those crossing signals a pain in the ass.  

It’s not that there aren’t enough places to cross. No.  Rarely do I find myself looking for an access point, but Auckland crosswalks are more of the quantity, not rapidity ilk. 

It’s not uncommon to wait well over  two minutes to cross the street. I know it doesn’t sound like much, but believe me, it is.  Especially when it's rainin. And if you come to one of the too-frequent corners where one side is blocked to pedestrian crossing, and in order to get to where you want to go you have to make three crossings rather than one, well clear your calendar folks, cause you’ll be there for a while.

The red man of idleness.  We're well acquainted

Crosswalks don’t automatically prepare for pedestrians either.  You have to physically push a button to activate the little “walk/don’t walk” men.  If you get the corner on a green, but push the button too late, tough titties. The red man of idleness pops up and you not only have to wait the normal interminable time, but you also have to wait out the time when you’d normally be crossing. 

Hi!  I'm ineffecitive!

What would normally be a five-minute walk quickly mutates into a 15 minute ordeal. Ugh.

To make matters worse, I just found out that In New Zealand pedestrians only have right of way on controlled crossings and footpaths. So in the event that you lose patience and cross somewhere other than an actual crosswalk or during a time when you don’t have the right of way, and you get hit by a car, there's no repercussion for the driver (I should verify this).

Let’s just say that I won’t be jaywalking until I get a handle on this “look right, then left before crossing the street” thing.  I’m just happy I have so much time on my hands that I can afford to spend large portions of my day waiting on street corners. (Wait, that sounds bad doesn’t it?)